In our quest to break habits, it is very important to understand that a habit actually functions to meet one of our needs. That is how it came into being in the first place. No matter how negative or destructive a habit may be, we developed that habit to use it for something.
Lets take the example of biting fingernails. Many people have this bad habit. However we can see a pattern from it. Usually people will bite their fingernails when they are feeling nervous or uneasy. So biting fingernails is actually a medium in which people use to relieve their nervousness and uneasiness.
When you break a habit, but did not replace it with an alternative to perform the old habits function, you will eventually go back to doing the old habit. As in the above example, if you dont find an alternative way to handle nervousness, if you dont have a way to release your emotions of anxiousness and uneasiness, youll eventually go back to your fingernail biting days.
So it is very important that you identify what the original function of your habit is. What did you gain on a physical, psychological and emotional level from partaking in that bad habit? Which needs did it meet? It may be to relieve pain, relieve boredom, to be an outlet for emotional release or something else.
Understand that by kicking the habit, youre gonna lose all these things. When that happens and theres no alternative to replace it, our being will yearn to have it back on an unconscious level. It is at this time that the habit takes the chance to re-establish itself.
To discover the function of a particular habit, it is often necessary to look deeper into ourselves and our actions. To do this, try to identify a pattern that regularly leads you to doing the habit. Look for indicators to help you find the original purpose which made you develop that habit in the first place.
To identify the patterns of the habit, ask yourself questions such as the following; what usually happens before you did the habit, who were you with; what time was it; what was the location; what were you doing at that time; what happened before and after doing the habit etc.
Once you have identified the function of the habit and the need that is being met by it, then find an alternative to replace it. Think of an effective way to meet that need and use it whenever you become aware of the need for it. For example the next time you become nervous, instead of biting fingernails, try doing breathing exercises that will calm the body down.
Only by finding good alternatives to replace the habits function can we effectively kick a bad habit in the long term.
Lets take the example of biting fingernails. Many people have this bad habit. However we can see a pattern from it. Usually people will bite their fingernails when they are feeling nervous or uneasy. So biting fingernails is actually a medium in which people use to relieve their nervousness and uneasiness.
When you break a habit, but did not replace it with an alternative to perform the old habits function, you will eventually go back to doing the old habit. As in the above example, if you dont find an alternative way to handle nervousness, if you dont have a way to release your emotions of anxiousness and uneasiness, youll eventually go back to your fingernail biting days.
So it is very important that you identify what the original function of your habit is. What did you gain on a physical, psychological and emotional level from partaking in that bad habit? Which needs did it meet? It may be to relieve pain, relieve boredom, to be an outlet for emotional release or something else.
Understand that by kicking the habit, youre gonna lose all these things. When that happens and theres no alternative to replace it, our being will yearn to have it back on an unconscious level. It is at this time that the habit takes the chance to re-establish itself.
To discover the function of a particular habit, it is often necessary to look deeper into ourselves and our actions. To do this, try to identify a pattern that regularly leads you to doing the habit. Look for indicators to help you find the original purpose which made you develop that habit in the first place.
To identify the patterns of the habit, ask yourself questions such as the following; what usually happens before you did the habit, who were you with; what time was it; what was the location; what were you doing at that time; what happened before and after doing the habit etc.
Once you have identified the function of the habit and the need that is being met by it, then find an alternative to replace it. Think of an effective way to meet that need and use it whenever you become aware of the need for it. For example the next time you become nervous, instead of biting fingernails, try doing breathing exercises that will calm the body down.
Only by finding good alternatives to replace the habits function can we effectively kick a bad habit in the long term.
About the Author:
Author Ethan Beh is a business consultant and self improvement enthusiast who has spent many years seeking, learning and practicing the best self improvement techniques available. Visit his website for his collection of personal development ideas which includes habit formation.
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